Berryz Kobo Alo Hello! and a whole lot of TMI

By: Xie

(￣ー￣)ﾉ" This is my first post of, hopefully, many more to come on a regular basis. My name on Hello! Online's christie, but on blogger I go by Xie. I'm an Idol Chatter translator, and I also have my own blog Momocore that I plan on sprucing up when I have the time. It's not particularly relevant or interesting, but I'll tell a bit about myself as a Hello! Project fan, just to give an idea of where I fall on the spectrum. The phrase, "They don't need your life story" vaguely crossed my mind, but since I'm probably going to be a permanent fixture here I figured I'd get all of my background info. out there just so you all know where I'm coming from. Feel free to skip this part entirely.

I've always been interested in Japan, Japanese culture, etc. I started studying Japanese casually about 4 years ago in my spare time. I randomly stumbled across Morning Musume videos and wanted to know more about them. From then on, I watched everything I could find of them and became a fan. My favorite was Nono (Tsuji Nozomi). I still have a place for her, among others, sewn into the framework of my Wota heart; a patch-work of new Idols overlapping those of the past, none ever completely forgotten. I liked many of the girls in their own ways; Morning Musume, Ayaya, W. I loved W, but when they ended, I lost interest in MoMusu.

I had never paid attention to the H!P Kids because I didn't "get it" at first. I thought they were just personality-less children with no talent; just gimmicks, cute dolls. However, when I heard "Special Generation" by chance, it changed my mind and opened up a whole new world for me. These girls were extraordinarily special; adorable and talented. They each had distinctive personalities and characteristics. I looked into them further and became a die hard fan instantaneously. I watched anything and everything I could find of them. At first I wasn't drawn to any member in particular, but I quickly noticed Momoko and became fascinated and intrigued by her. The time I got into them was only around when 'Kokuhaku' was being released, and I saw this video of Momo doing a morning TV spot in her "factory" costume. Her beauty, her mannerisms, her mysterious aura, her overall being captured my heart. I was really into Berryz for a while. I never visited forums or got involved with the community for some reason, but I followed their every move.

But, I knew it was more like a vice, an unhealthy mode of escape. As much as I loved them, my life wasn't improving around me. I thought, there's no way I can live life and follow H!P at the same time - it's either completely or not at all. I was so blinded by this beautiful world, it distracted me from the stark reality around me. I could see my true state, in the unforgiving light that exposes fantasies and dreams as empty words, insubstantial concepts, colorful illusions; shapeless, weightless, and false. Only the raw and undeniable facts remain, smoke and mirrors exposed. So, I proceeded to delete all of the H!P from my laptop and my mind, and focus on living. Well, that didn't help after all. About a year later, I missed it and got back into the loop. I reignited the interest I began a while back and discovered the H!O community. My favorite groups are still Buono! and Berryz; my favorite member being...well, you know the rest.(o￫ܫ￩o) I hope to someday be able to see Momo at a concert or event of some kind.

I had a pretty rough, gloomy youth. I ended up more of a punk kid as a result. I wasn't able to fit in anywhere, especially as a gay girl, and with a troubled past I kept hidden inside, there was always a wall up that prevented me from getting close to anyone or engaging in society. Why tell all of that personal information? Because, that's where my love for Idols comes in. Idols simply make me happy. They fill the gaping holes in my damaged heart and heal my broken soul. I love them and they love me back, without asking for anything in return. I'm a little, let's say, rough around the edges lol - I have difficulty finding girls I even get along with, nevermind that would give me the time of day. I get along with messed up kids just fine lol, but not with most 'normal' people, especially girls. With Idols, I'm able to be close to these angels and goddesses on Earth that I wouldn't otherwise be able to in real life. And I'm not the only one who feels that way - the entire Wota nation concurs. The Idol machine is incomprehensibly genius, flawlessly executed and conceived; stealing our hearts and wallets simultaneously. And we don't mind, because we'd walk 100 miles through the desert just to stand in their shadow. (。_＋)＼

I've been surrounded by a predominantly straight world my whole life. Though it may seem creepy or pathetic to want to see more images of girl love, then that's your opinion, but unless you've walked that dark, lonely path yourself, you don't know what it's like. For that reason, the same reason I love Yuri/Shoujo-ai anime and manga as well, I love the closeness and bond the girls share; their friendship and love for each other. How they hug, hold hands, joke about being couples, talk about things they do together like walking home and sleeping in the same bed. It's just extremely cute, is all. My love for Momo specifically is another story, though, in itself. ﾙ ’ｰ’ﾘ人(^ー^♥) *Oh sweet denial*

Some brief info. about myself: I live in Mass., US. My main passion, other than Momo, is music. I love drumming - I've been playing my whole life. I'm a Gemini, so I'm kind of all over the place lol. My musical taste is just as contradictory - Sludge, crust, doom, grind.. and the cutesy-est, sweetest pop on the planet. Go figure. Anyway, I'm pretty boring underneath the craziness. The only thing I can really say about myself is I'm allergic to the mundane, routine, superficial, and petty. I'm interested in all things beautiful, romantic, fantastical, thought-provoking, taboo, out of the ordinary. Idols and Yuri are my anti-drug. Actually, I love AKB48, too, but that little blasphemous fact won't be brought up in these parts. （≧∀≦）

As for my role in the H!P community, and what you can expect from me - I don't exactly have a niche. I'm not an expert in any area, (unless you count Momo-ology ☆（＞ェ＜；) I've never been to Japan to see them. I'm just a fan with a decent comprehension of Japanese. I can find sites and read what fans are saying. Japanese fans write down everything the girls ever say, including transcripts, what they recall from events, the contents of the MCs of the shows they attended, etc. I'll be translating random things from the past and present, predominantly of Berryz and Buono! since they're my favorite, but also H!P in general. I feel any and every piece of media is important; old articles, radio shows, etc. because they are just as much who they are now as they were 5 years ago, are they not? It's not humanly possible to keep up with the perpetual mass of H!P media. It's like emptying water out of the ocean with a bucket. But that won't stop me from crusading and shouting Idol praise from the mountaintops. ♪＾▽＾

The things I post will be completely random, but even if it's taking a while, or I'm preoccupied with something, I'll always be working on something and putting things out. I have a decent handle on Japanese, but I'm by no means fluent. It's more of a slow, painstaking process for me. But there's so much that foreign fans don't know about the girls, if I can help in any way, I don't mind taking the time to do so. The members of Idol Chatter share that same sentiment. I will be waxing poetic and posting about all that is Momo-specific on my blog, Momocore, and posting translations and whatever else comes to mind here. My only hope is that more H!P fans take what's available and discuss it, blog about it, take it and run with it. Ultimately, all I, and everyone here at Idol Chatter, hope to do is bring you closer to your Idols and keep you on the same page as the Japanese fans.
======================

Alo Hello! Berryz Kobo DVD Comments:
2009 has been good to us. In June, the first Alo Hello! Berryz Kobo DVD came out, and it didn't disappoint. I've watched every second of it on repeat for 2 months subbing it, but I still enjoy it. The commentary that came with it was just as, if not more, entertaining as the main video itself. It took as long as it did because we wanted to time and translate every single bit of audio and on-screen text. I worked away at the main and commentary audio constantly, chipping away at it like a block of ice with a chisel until it was completely accurate. I don't think you can get much closer to the girls than you're able to via the commentary. It's great to be able to hear what they had to say about the experience and each other.

Some personal thoughts and highlights:

I think the ukulele expert could've been funnier; like so ridiculous that they were desperately holding back laughter. That guy was more-so odd than funny; hence the question marks on their faces. But still, we got to see their impenetrable, professional Idol game faces of steel. With the exception of Risako.

I would feel kind of annoyed if I were them, to be filmed eating lunch. They know they have to be in Idol mode for the DVD, but they probably were thinking they really just want to eat without having to play to the camera lol. Maasa being bullied was cute. But that made me think, the only time they had a "main target" (Maa and Chii) was for the lunch scene. It would've been funny if they had specific pranks planned for every member. Although, I'm sure the reason they didn't do that is because that increased the chance of them suspecting it.

On the subject of pranks, I can't help but feel bad for them when they were scared by the guy in the van. I don't like seeing them run for their lives, it's a little painful to watch. But I guess that's the kind of thing you do to Idols - get reactions. We got to see a side of them we've never seen, looking death in the eye. I love how Maasa books it without thinking twice. I read from Japanese fans that apparently she's a bit of a scaredy cat, which is adorable since she has such a 'cool' image. She's afraid of water, as well. Miya said what everyone was thinking in the commentary: "Miya always thought Maasa would be the one who comes to our rescue... but you were the first to run!" (＞▽＜) She didn't forget you, Berryz! She was leading the way, assuming you'd follow suit behind her like a Mama duck with her babies.

They were more like chickens with their heads cut off, which is understandable; they had no idea what was going on. It's tricky to be ambushed and think sensibly at the same time. They did stick together for the most part, and Risako pulled Momo back, so I don't think they just flat-out left their fellow Berryz in the dust. Though, I thought they might've felt bad for Momo when she was crying, but of course they just made fun of her haha... I'll comfort you Momo, don't cry. *creep* ﾙ ;-;ﾘ＼(^ε^♥)

For the shopping, they're split into Team A: Saki, Maasa, and Kumai - the boring group. Team B: the childish group, Momo and Risako ("Fruities"), and Team B: Miya and Chii, the baka group. I was expecting Chii to do better with English since she likes English and is always talking about it and spouting it out at any given opportunity. But what I got instead was, "Please yes." (^▽^) I've noticed this on other occasions as well, but Miya has surprisingly amazing English pronunciation. There's always been something that seems Western, or not completely Japanese about her to me, that I can't put my finger on. It's funny because Miya's not known for her "smarts," but she has naturally great English pronunciation. Like when she says "Discount?" for example. It's extremely cute. But Chinami... is just Chinami.(^-^)

The two scenes where they're eating ice-cream are adorable. I've developed the "Idol Eye" when watching videos. You keep an eye on all of them so you don't miss anything. For example, Miya's sweater, Saki cleaning Chii's teeth: Miya-centric raburabu: ♥

The most entertaining shopping scenes were Miya and Chii's. I love their walk of shame back to meet some pissed-off Berryz across the board. On the contrary, Momo can glare at me like that any day... Hah

These final scenes are my favorite of the DVD. Their commentary basically covers it all. Momo and Chinami's watermelon attempts were adorable. Chinami's so cute, she's like an Anime character. Not to mention she has the most dazzling, inhuman smile on the planet. Her eyes twinkle, she always looks like she's beaming with joy. Her face is happiness defined.

The dodge ball game was classic. Like she pointed out, when they realized they were against the all-mighty Maasa, "It was like I was a monster or something." (^▽^〃) It turned out the real monsters to look out for were Miya and Chii. They were really kicking ass. Specifically Momo's. (ﾟ～ﾟ) Saki kept like grabbing her inner thighs for some reason, which was... distracting? （ﾟДﾟ;) Captain, as a general rule, try not to engage in any suggestive activity when the Wota are watching. We have a weak threshold for sexiness; we're virtually powerless against it. m(x_x)m

The scene where they play on the beach is adorable and touching. Highlight: Chii's violent bullying and child-like enthusiasm. Are you sure you're not a cartoon character, Chii? Please double check for me.

The paint scene. Something about their uniform white clothes somehow gives me the impression they planned this whole "paint on each other" situation beforehand. Hmm~ *strokes non-existent beard* This set up is pure win.
(´▽｀) Many questionable incidents occurred, however.

Questionable incident #1: Risako spilling the worst possible color paint in the worst possible place, and Momo's consequential delight. This is like porn to me, haha, Momo's hands... Hey, *dumps can of paint on myself* I accidentally spilled some, too! You wanna help me out...? >_>

#2: MiyaSaki paint gif The undeniable scandalousness of Miya painting Saki's chest. And the undeniable fact that this will be a recurring image in my fantasies... did I type that out loud? (￢_￢)

#3: One of our so-called 'innocent' little Berryz has stealthfully groped our 15-year old Socko. Show yourself, culprit, we've caught you pink-handed. Japanese fans think Chinami did it while Momo and Maasa were rubbing paint on each other. I think the editor is in cahoots with Satan. (｀ﾍ´#)"

My favorite moment in the entire DVD is this one -> Maasa Momo paint gif with Momo and Maasa. Momo's smile is so childish and happy. For a second she looked like a kid again.

Another thing I somehow missed - I must've been on horse tranquilizers or something at the time. I was probably distracted by the purple Chinami monster, but you can plainly see, like a target visible from space, the peach Momo spoke of in the commentary that Kumai painted on her bum.

Which raises another obvious question that needs answering. Why do they cut out all of the parts we're most interested in? Miya joining in on Chii's "Billy's Boot Camp," Kumai painting a peach on Momo's bum, some hoodlum tagging Socko's chest... I guess those tapes go on the Director's cut. And by that I mean literally a cut that the Director takes home for himself. Bastard~ How dare you... not share with us?

Random Gifs:
Dodgeball gif
Momo Ukulele gif
MomoMiya gif
SakiChiiMiya beach gif
MiyaChii beach gif
Momo fall gif
Saki dodgeball gif
========
If you have any comments or opinions on something, by all means send 'em our way. Also, if there are any articles, radio shows, things of that nature that you'd like translated, send me a pm on H!O as a kind of request, and I'll let you know if I'd be able to. Keep checking in on Idol Chatter and Momocore. You're always bound to find something from the Mota on a mission. ☆(^━^)ﾉ